Petite PLANET en partenariat avec l'Association "Dessine-moi un bébé" vous propose un:
Vendredi 6 mai à 9h15 Café/parent en bilingue anglais autour du thème:
"Parlez pour que les enfants écoutent et Ecouter pour que les enfants parlent"
Devenir parent n'est pas aussi simple, et nous sommes confrontés au quotidien à des obstacles qui nous semblent infranchissables parfois!
crise d'opposition, chantage affectif
aucune coopération à la maison "mon ado est à l'hôtel"
culpabilité, punition
violence, rapport de force
conflits, mensonges
manque de confiance en soi
manque d'autonomie
rôles établis, étiquettes…
Autant de sujets auquel nous sommes tous confrontés…
Venez partager vos expériences et en débattre.
Nous vous présenterons également les Ateliers D'Adèle Faber et Elaine Mazlish qui nous viennent du Canada et qui, au travers d'une méthode pratique et ludique peuvent nous aider à devenir acteur de notre parentalité.
Evelyne Bablot De Matos est mère de trois adorables chérubins, assistante pédagogique au collège et doula (accompagnante à la naissance)
Elle est formée en tant qu'animatrice et certifiée par "l'Ecole des Parents" www.latelierdesparents.fr
Conference at Petite Planet
The spouse facing expatriation : new difficulties and opportunites.
Cathleen de Kerchove
Assisted by Marie Ravoire and Franck Scola
In its cycle of conferences of experts on interculturality and expat life, Petite Planet organised the evening on Friday 18 March a meeting on the theme « Spouse and expatriation : new challenges and opportunities », presented by Cathleen de Kerchove, recognised specialist on the problems of spouses in expatriation.
In charge of the psych part « psy d’expat » on the web site expatclic.com founded by Marie Ravoire, she collected for many years on the forum the secrets and complaints of the expatriate wives. She also assumed assistance for French people moving abroad. From these experiences, she acquired her expertise about the recurring and specific issues related to expatriation.
We finally managed to come together for our first meeting, after 10 years of collaborating via the internet through expatclic.com and several co-publications on the conditions of life of expatriate families, looked at by our three different fields of expertise: psychological, sociological and medical.
There were more than 20 people from 8 different countries, Marie Ravoire has pointed out what all those people had in common: an experience (past, present or future) of expatriation.
Some people came in couples, others by themselves, as wife or husband of professionals living in Manosque. Some French were here as well, having been expatriated in the past, like Christophe (19 years in Africa) or Xavier (first sent to the U.S. where he met his wife with whom he went to Germany… to end up settling in Manosque with their three children), or as future expatriates, like Florence and Franck, who have always lived in France but are now getting ready to go to Brazil with their son, or simply being curious like Magali who is an English student at Petite Planet and who wants to better understand as a dedicated medical secretary what her expatriated patients are living.
The reality of an expatriate spouse’s life is very few documented, often neglected or misunderstood. It is sometimes completely forgotten in public institutions as well as in private companies. For 10 years Cathleen de Kerchove has been breaking the tabou subject on the specific risks that are facing expatriated spouse’s. Talking about the consequence on the health, the balance of the couple and the well being of the whole family she makes the distinction between normal signs and those that have to be recognised as symptoms and should be medically looked after.
She started by erasing the false idea: that follow your spouse who has been promoted in a foreign country position is not a privileged situation in all respects, but more a family choice that implicates sacrifices and to measure the risks.
Cathleen is preaching that the decision of leaving has to be discussed by the couple a long way in advance. In all her examples she first talked about the crucial topic of money, when only one person is contributing financially, leaving the other one in a dependant position. Although accepted it can be a source of unwell being, arguments and regrets…
To prevent those risks she advises that the one following, should take an active role in the logistics, before, during and until going back: finding accommodation, schooling, health, social protection and banking… taken as a primary role, all those demands can lead to meeting people, expatriates, compatriots, even locals. This unemployed period could be well used to discover local culture, language or life-style. Taking part in associations or clubs has been mentioned as fulfilling experiences.
The Maslow’s hierarchy of needs represented by a pyramid has been used by Cathleen to explain the quest of the spouse for well being and accomplishment. The theory explains that five needs are used to make the layers of the pyramid, each one needing to be complete to get to the next one. It starts with elementary needs (physiological and security), followed by the need to be loved and to be part of a group, then the need of self-esteem and finally the need of happiness.
We couldn’t avoid talking about the body and its mechanism. Hormones and neurotransmission are created by the stress of this change of social status and the arrival in e new physical environment, language and culture. They are affecting the mood, libido as well as physical and intellectual capacity. To conclude, this stress as a medical term is as much due to emotions as the new lifestyle.
During this interactive meeting confidence has been made by the participants and each testimony confirmed Cathleens’ presentation. These experiences were often laughed at even if they were painful at the time.
Different aspects have been debated without reaching agreements, showing the complexity and the many different factors in the life of expatriate spouses.
The success of this event presented by such a distinguished author, justifies once again congratulating Petite Planet for its role of public interest, its efficient participation in helping the expat communities to take their adjustments and for building bridges between them and the Manosque population.
Bravo and thanks to Marie, Gilles, Renée, Laurence, Magali,
Franck Scola
Friday, March 18th from 8.00 to 10.00 pm
in French and English
Presented by Cathleen de Kerchove, therapist, transition consultant, and author of the "Expat Psychology" articles on www.expatclic.com.
Mrs. de Kerchove currently lives in Brussels and will honour us with her presence before leaving for another continent. She will talk about the expatriate’s partner situation: Which challenges and opportunities?
Expatriation means being exposed to different changes that impact on several levels. The conference aims at clarifying the transition steps during expatriation, understanding the difference between the “normal” consequences and the “warning signs” which should be taken into account for both the spouse and the couple. The twenty-minute pitch will be followed by a debate.
Come and share your experience,
and/or benefit from her advice.
If you are an expatriate around Manosque,
don't miss this unique event
Feel free to forward to people who might be interested.
Joined by:
Marie Ravoire, former expatriate, founder of the website expatclic.com
and Petite Planet, the international bookshop and intercultural meeting place located in Manosque
and Dr Franck Scola, family doctor, author of studies on specific medical and social issues related to expatriate families.
Free entrance, booking compulsory. Please confirm attendance by phone or e-mail
Mrs. de Kerchove should attend a seminar the day after, therefore we will hold this conference only if we have 12 reservations within Wednesday.
Families welcome!
Baby-sitting service and games for children will be available in a separate room (3€/child only if booked before)
Bonjour!
It's a very sad day for me today, because it's my last day at Petite Planet. I have commitments back home in England, so I'm having to return to the 'rainy territory'! However, I just couldn't leave without saying goodbye to all my dear friends, especially my students, both adults and children, who over the past 9 months have become more than just students, they have become my friends. I have a lot of special memories to take back with me to England, which will cheer me up on those rainy days! I have had a wonderful 2 ½ years here in France, it has been a dream come true. I shall be back for my holidays, so we may well meet up again soon.
I wish you all continued improvement in your English studies.
Lots of love,
Alice, xxx
A warming Welcome to Renée from Australia, who is taking care of the English converstional workshops.
Alice, we will miss you. Please come to see us again when you come back times to times to France.
Marie, Gilles and The Petite Planet Team
At Petite PLANET, you may have come across one of these cute multicolored cats with its front paw up? But what kind of a cat is it?
Well, this is a Maneki-neko (maneki-neko literally meaning « beckoning cat »), a very popular Japanese tradition, which is believed to bring good luck. This is why in Japan, you can see them everywhere, at the front or back of shops or restaurants, to call customers and thiving business, and also in people’s houses for protection or as a lucky charm.
A legendary magic power :
The most famous legend about Maneki-neko is the story of « the temple cat »: a feudal lord was taking shelter under a tree in a temple during a thunderstorm. The lord saw a cat raise its front paw like beckoning to him ; as the lord walked towards the cat, the tree where he was standing a few moments earlier suddenly got struck by lightning. To show his gratitude for having his life saved by the cat, the lord helped the temple with donations and the temple became prosperous.
Right paw or left paw ?
Some Maneki-nekos raise their left paw and others raise their right paw. It is said that the one with its lefts paw calls customers or people, while the one with its right paw up calls money and good fortune. Nowadays there are also Maneki-nekos raising both paws, and even sometimes all four!…
Colors for good luck !
Maneki-nekos usually have some decoration around their neck ; most commonly a collar, bell and decorative bib, which was the attire for cats in wealthy households during the Edo period (1600-1868).
They show out in various colors. The most popular one is tri color (black, white, brown), which has been considered as a lucky charm worldwide, probably because of the rarity of tri colored cats. The second most popular color is white, which is the symbol of purity. There are also other colors as black, gold, pink red etc, to protect again Evil, illness, ort call for love, success etc….
Maneki-neko is traditionally a sculpture but it is also seen as a variety of accessories, objects or ornaments in various sizes, to carry good luck with you wherever you are …
* Intercultural anecdote:
Maneki-neko’s gesture means beckoning in Japan : by holding up the hand, palm out, and repeatedly folding the fingers down and back up. However to Westerners, this gesture may rather seem like waving. This is how one can sometimes see funny situations of body language misunderstanding, when a Westerner answers by a saying goodbye and walks away whereas the Japanese actually means to invite him/her to come closer!…
By Isabelle Thiery-Misato (イザベラ テイエリ・見里)
http://homepage.mac.com/ithierymisato/
Photos ©I.Thiery-Misato
A lire tout en dégustant un Thé rouge Rooibos d'Afrique du Sud bien sûr ! (disponible chez Petite PLANET)
Au lendemain de l'inauguration du Mondial de Foot, nous avons souhaité mettre à l'honneur l'Afrique du Sud.
Renée Greyling, sud africaine, vivant en France depuis une dizaine d'années nous a parlé de son enfance, où la mixité culturelle était alors insouciante et où, élevés dans une ferme gigantesque, jouer entre enfants de couleurs de peau différentes, était naturel, ou tout du moins on ne se posait pas de questions. C'est avec franchise et humilité que Renée a partagé ses questionnements sur le fait de ne pas avoir pu voir les dysfonctionnements de son pays avant la libération de Nelson Mandela.
Une belle leçon de vie, où on est en mesure de s'interroger sur l'impact des politiques internationales et des carcans culturels dans lesquels nous sommes tous moulés…… sans nous en rendre compte…. à moins d'ouvrir notre esprit !
Many thanks Renée for this wonderful and interesting afternoon !
I was very happy when Marie asked me to participate in the “Anti foot” get together on South Africa since I am so busy on a day to day basis with my life in France that I rarely allow myself the luxury of going back into the past and recalling my life as a child and young adult in that splendid country. Memories that are beautiful and painful at the same time, memories of events that have shaped me into who I am today, and irrevocably part of me.
Books on the history of my country that have given me insight into what had happened, and especially why, include Dominique Lapierre’s “Un arc-en-ciel dans la nuit” and obviously Nelson Mandela’s “Long walk to freedom”. André Brink, an Afrikaner whose political consciousness was awoken in France while he was studying at the Sorbonne, wrote the acclaimed “A Dry White Season” (“Une saison blanche et sèche”) in 1979, and many other masterworks were to follow.
Another renowned writer, Breyten Breytenbach, who himself, due to his anti Apartheid combats, spent several years in prison, has written numerous novels and poems over the years, all of which are translated into French too. Breytenbach’s latest publication is “Notes from the Middle World: Essays” (“Le monde du milieu”). And of course, South African born Marita van der Vyver now living in France wrote “Entertaining Angels” in the early nineties, a novel that touched on all taboo subjects for once and for all, and a novel that cooked up a storm in a country where everything had always been strictly censored.
A delightful afternoon in the company of the Petite Planet and the generous people I met who were truly interested in my country and with whom I could share my experiences.
Café Polyglotte gives me a chance to meet new people from all over the world speaking many different languages. But what I, as an American Expat, especially like are the French people I meet. I’ve lived in Manosque for five years, the first four of which were spent learning to understand people who spoke French to me! It took me a long time to become bilingual (apparently, I’m a slow learner). I often felt frustrated and isolated with only my English speaking friends to talk to. Yes, I had French speaking friends too, but our relationships were sometimes a bit shallow–it’s hard to have a profound conversation when you can only conjugate verbs in the present tense.
As my French improved my circle of friends grew. Now, I feel like wherever I go I can meet people, talk to them and understand what they are saying! Café Polyglotte gives me a chance to meet people who are interested in languages and the countries where those languages are spoken. I loved the quiz Marie and Alice put together where we discovered and debated lots of fun facts.
I think when we learn another language, and have the opportunity to practice it, we are constantly thinking about how language in general works. I’m always thinking about how to say, x, y or z in either French or English, or both at the same time! I’m fascinated by language, how we learn it, where words originate from and how they are changed over time. Café Polyglotte gives me the opportunity to explore those subjects with other people who are like-minded. Thanks Marie and Alice!
Avec le Café Polyglotte, j’ai l’opportunité de rencontrer des inconnus du monde entier qui parlent plusieurs langues différentes. Le truc que j’aime en particulier, en tant qu’expat américaine, sont les français que je rencontre là bas. J’habite à Manosque depuis 5 ans, mais les 4 premières années j’essayais juste de comprendre quand les gens me parlaient en français ! Cela m’a pris un moment pour devenir bilingue (apparemment, je suis une étudiante un peu lente). Souvent, j’étais frustrée et isolée et je n’avais que mes amis anglophones pour parler. Bien sûr, j’ai des amis qui ne parlent pas du tout l’anglais mais nos conversations étaient peu développées—c’est difficile de parler quand on ne peut que conjuguer au présent.
Mais petit à petit mon français a progressé, ainsi que mon cercle d’amis. Aujourd’hui j’ai le sentiment que peu importe où je suis, je peux parler et comprendre tout le monde ! Au Café Polyglotte je rencontre des gens qui s’intéressent aux langues et aux pays où ils sont allés. J’ai adoré le petit quiz que Marie et Alice ont préparé qui nous a fait découvrir plein de choses et débattre de plein d’idées.
Je crois que quand on apprend une autre langue, et que l’on a l’opportunité de s’exprimer dans cette langue nous pensons sans arrêt à la façon dont elle fonctionne. Moi, je pense sans cesse à la manière d’exprimer telle ou telle phrase, expression ou argot en français ou en anglais ou les deux en même temps ! Je suis fascinée par cette idée : comment apprendre une langue ; quelle est l’origine des mots et comment ont-ils évolué avec le temps. Le Café Polyglotte me donne l’opportunité d’explorer ces sujets avec des gens qui y portent le même intérêt. Merci beaucoup Marie et Alice !
Written by Randi Cox, an american in Manosque
Café Polyglotte du samedi 5 juin 2010
ANTI-FOOT Get Together
Special
SOUTH AFRICA
Saturday, June 12th at 4 pm
Not everyone is a fan of football !
After the inauguration of the World Cup we are proposing a special South African Coffee Afternoon, with Renée Greyling, a South African, who will come to talk to us about her country and recommend some good books to read.
in French and in English
Entrance free
Let us know if you are coming
Once upon a time, I was marching in Manosque, with my family when, suddenly, je saw a New boutique !! I am very curieuse, and very aventureuse and, then, j'entrai in the boutique. Il y avait some personnes who were empiling bouquins on étagères en train de se monter. Marie came vers moi and commença à explain to me what was Petite (avec e) Planet (sans e) : a librairie internationale, and also a salon de thé and, also, a boutique de loisirs créatifs, and, also, a lieu d'échanges and rencontres, and also a place where on peut speaker english or japanese or italiano or español. She has rêvé Petite Planete pendant toutes ses years d'expat'. Her dreams ont constructed this boutique where you can passer des heures à fouiner among books and decopatch and thés and jeux and bricolages and déco and where you can vous asseoir, drink a coffee, a tea, a matcha or a jus de fruits, alone or avec des amis, fabriquer un objet, participer à des ateliers créatifs, speak in cafés polyglotte, rencontrer strangers (et même des manosquins !!) et tisser tout plein d'amitiés …
GENIALOUS, me dis-je !
alors, I gave Marie my mail, for the newsletter,
I promise to moi-même to come souvent,
I inscripted mon fils to the english lessons,
I adopted PETITE PLANET
and , finally,
I became an Astre of the Constellation Petite Planet !
My name dans la Constellation is Astronomic
And I hope astronomic … kement fort
Que Petite Planet deviendra
très très grande et très très peuplée !
Cafe Expat
Living in France : easy or not easy
Friday, June, 4th from 10 am to noon
in English and French
You are a newcomer in Manosque,
it is your 1st expatriation,
your first time in France…
Are you a bit lost, missing your friends, feeling home sick…
Is speaking French for you more a case of sign language ?
Come and talk to us about your experiences,
and benefit from our advices and tips.
Run by Marie Ravoire, former expatriate, founder of the website expatclic.com
and Petite Planet, the intercultural meeting place in Manosque
and Franck Scola author of publications on specific medical and social issues facing expat families.
Families welcome ! Entrance is free.
Let us know by e-mail if you will join us